Charting Your Own Course

I would like to start this post by saying that this is without a doubt the best week of the year; it is only two days long, one of those days is an early release, and two of my classes are doing nothing but watching movies. What is more remarkable than the fact that one of those classes is AP English, is the similarity between the two movies. We are watching The Namesake in English and my Sociology class is watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding, both movies follow the lives of people whose parents have very specific expectations for them. However, these people all react to these expectations in different ways. Here is what I see as the three main examples.

Gogol resents the cultural identity and expectations his parents push on him, especially during his youth. He rebels against them and rejects both his family and his culture during the first few decades of his life. Unfortunately, this rebellious course leaves Gogol with feelings of regret and loneliness.

Toula takes another approach; she goes along with her family's expectations to the point that she becomes a doormat. Toula feels just as unhappy and defeated as Gogol, until she finds the strength to take control of her own life.

Ian does not come from an immigrant family, like Toula and Gogol do, but his family has its own culture, including the expectation that he will become a lawyer. Although Ian still loves and respects his parents, he decides to diverge from their plans for him and become a teacher instead of a lawyer. Ian retains a positive relationship with his parents, but he also gets to do what he wants with his life, and although his life is not perfect Ian seems to be the happiest of the bunch.

Watching these movies has helped me better understand the conundrum Gogol faces: how to live his own life without betraying his family. The conclusion I have come to is that people who find themselves in this  situation need to realize that they have the right to pursue whatever lifestyle makes them happy (so long as it does not harm society). But people should not pursue independence or fulfillment in a way which disrespects or hurts their family because this will only increase the conflict and difficulty in their lives.